For those of us who strive to excel in our careers and/or ace relationships, we may drive ourselves too hard, and feel depleted. Then, If we don't reach our goals, we focus on how bad we messed up, and get down on ourselves.
Updated 1/26/2026
Putting undue pressure on ourselves makes us feel frustrated, cranky, and sets off negative self-talk that can get loud and insulting. This doesn't have to happen.
Putting undue pressure on ourselves makes us feel frustrated, cranky, and sets off negative self-talk that can get loud and insulting. This doesn't have to happen.
Holding on to unrealistic expectations of ourselves is destructive to our self-esteem.
If you can relate, know that the self-care tips I share below have helped me in innumerable ways.
Try them on for size, and let me know in the comments section under this post how it went.
Each helps reverse a self-defeating attitude, lightens things up, and opens our hearts to self-love.
But first, ask yourself the following:
Do I think self-love is a selfish characteristic?
Read the wise words of Andrea Brandt PhD, MFT, who was a therapist in private practice in CA. Her insights about self-love are right on. The quote below is shared with her permission.
“Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others.
Self-love means not settling for less than you deserve.”
Since February is often thought of as the LOVE month, this post features tips and reminders to help us navigate and celebrate our love relationship with ourselves.
Now on to
Read the wise words of Andrea Brandt PhD, MFT, who was a therapist in private practice in CA. Her insights about self-love are right on. The quote below is shared with her permission.
“Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others.
Self-love means not settling for less than you deserve.”
She continues, "Self-love means giving
yourself what
your body, brain, and soul
needs for the marathon that is life.
It isn’t
hedonism and it isn’t chasing a
physical or emotional high. The practice of
self-love is the practice of nourishing
yourself."
💖
Since February is often thought of as the LOVE month, this post features tips and reminders to help us navigate and celebrate our love relationship with ourselves.
Now on to
Creative Ideas to Help Us Open Our Hearts to Self-Love!
Harness Color Energy. 💖
When we are mindful of the colors we choose to look at, wear, or surround ourselves with, we can absorb their color energy for our good.
When we are mindful of the colors we choose to look at, wear, or surround ourselves with, we can absorb their color energy for our good.
Colors bypass thinking and interact with us at the cellular level. Envisioning certain colors is an easy way to convert negative thoughts to positive ones, balance or inspire passion, and influence us to act kinder and more compassionately with ourselves.
Most of us are aware that Valentine colors are usually RED, PINK, and WHITE. There are several reasons this is so.
RED is the color of heart health, passion, excitement, enthusiasm, love, courage, fire, and Valentine's Day.
RED is the color of heart health, passion, excitement, enthusiasm, love, courage, fire, and Valentine's Day.
Red speeds up metabolism and energizes us. Women may enjoy accessorizing with bright red shoes and purse, and men can don a red cap or tie to get pep and pizazz with red.
Here's what I mean. Debbie Ross from Debbie Styles Life shows us Subtle Ways to Incorporate Valentine Colors into Wardrobes.
Here's what I mean. Debbie Ross from Debbie Styles Life shows us Subtle Ways to Incorporate Valentine Colors into Wardrobes.
PINK is a nurturing, supportive color, one that
instinctively reminds us of warm feelings, unconditional love, and gentleness.
Pink is red and white combined. This mix provides a helpful balance of male and
female energies. Pink can reduce stress and exudes a
gentle healing energy.
We can use this sweet color to nurture ourselves, calm us, and decrease loneliness. More about the color pink in Ways to Use Colors to Improve Work Life Balance.
Perhaps WHITE resonates with us. It is an empowering color, one we can use to visualize white light around us.
Its energy is cleansing, healing, protecting, and raises consciousness by helping support a spiritual connection.
A word of caution. Maintain personal values,
When we need motivation to be more self-compassionate, say affirmations, get support from people who recognize our goodness. and hang out with people who bring out the best in us.
If it seems as though we don't like who we are, imagine we are a beloved child, grandchild, or dear friend. How would we treat them? Then just treat ourselves that way.
Take a moment to applaud and appreciate even the smallest forward motion.
Use additional moments scattered
Forgive yourself for past mistakes. Learn from slips-ups and use them as stepping stones for personal growth.
Perhaps WHITE resonates with us. It is an empowering color, one we can use to visualize white light around us.
Its energy is cleansing, healing, protecting, and raises consciousness by helping support a spiritual connection.
Envision white for a sense of security, or buy white roses to represent self-love that is pure and steadfast.
When we wear white or lounge on white pillows or a blanket, think devotion.
We can use a white crystal called selenite in our homes or hold a selenite wand in front of our bodies. White has many rejuvenating and mystical properties.
Be Good to Ourselves. 💖
Wholesome self-care includes eating meals that consist of nourishing whole food, and getting regular exercise.
It includes pursuing interests and work that makes us feel enthusiastic about life, getting adequate rest and sleep, and making time for people and things we love.
Many of us find that contributing to a greater good, and creating a place of stillness inside ourselves (with prayer, meditation, yoga, or other healing practices) are lifestyle choices that help nurture us.
Each self-care practice prepares us to be more flexible and resilient, especially in adverse conditions and a sometimes harsh world.
Look in the mirror each day and affirm I love my mind, body, and spirit exactly as it is.
Make a list of your strong points/assets and shortcomings/ vulnerabilities. Accept them all just for today.
Note personality traits with lovingkindness. These characteristics have gotten you this far and deserve a thank you.
When we wear white or lounge on white pillows or a blanket, think devotion.
We can use a white crystal called selenite in our homes or hold a selenite wand in front of our bodies. White has many rejuvenating and mystical properties.
Be Good to Ourselves. 💖
Wholesome self-care includes eating meals that consist of nourishing whole food, and getting regular exercise.
It includes pursuing interests and work that makes us feel enthusiastic about life, getting adequate rest and sleep, and making time for people and things we love.
Many of us find that contributing to a greater good, and creating a place of stillness inside ourselves (with prayer, meditation, yoga, or other healing practices) are lifestyle choices that help nurture us.
Each self-care practice prepares us to be more flexible and resilient, especially in adverse conditions and a sometimes harsh world.
Look in the mirror each day and affirm I love my mind, body, and spirit exactly as it is.
Make a list of your strong points/assets and shortcomings/ vulnerabilities. Accept them all just for today.
Note personality traits with lovingkindness. These characteristics have gotten you this far and deserve a thank you.
Ponder this “To
be beautiful means to be yourself. You don't need to be accepted by others. You
need to accept yourself. When you are born a lotus flower, be a beautiful
lotus flower, don't try to be a magnolia flower. If you crave acceptance and
recognition and try to change yourself to fit what other people want you to be,
you will suffer all your life. True happiness and true power lie in
understanding yourself, accepting yourself, having confidence in yourself.”
―The Art of Power
If your self-confidence level is low, be proactive and do things to help change your beliefs about self-worth.
Be willing to increase skills by enrolling in courses, apprenticing, and trying out new things.
It's never too late to increase knowledge about topics you know little about, and it's an excellent way to find new passions.
Make it a priority to cherish yourself. Admit and affirm everyone has qualities that make them unique and special.
Be willing to increase skills by enrolling in courses, apprenticing, and trying out new things.
It's never too late to increase knowledge about topics you know little about, and it's an excellent way to find new passions.
Make it a priority to cherish yourself. Admit and affirm everyone has qualities that make them unique and special.
Remember we are all part of the human race,
and are ALL GOOD ENOUGH.
ethics, and morals. Refrain from people
pleasing to get ahead or be "liked." We need
to get validation by being honest, honoring
our truths, and loving ourselves. Being true
to ourselves is the best policy for self-love
and life satisfaction.
When we need motivation to be more self-compassionate, say affirmations, get support from people who recognize our goodness. and hang out with people who bring out the best in us.
If it seems as though we don't like who we are, imagine we are a beloved child, grandchild, or dear friend. How would we treat them? Then just treat ourselves that way.
Take a moment to applaud and appreciate even the smallest forward motion.
Use additional moments scattered
throughout the day to observe whether you
are hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. These are
times to HALT.
Journal to open your heart more fully to self-love. Write, draw, or color in a journal to discover simple ways to take tender loving care of yourself. 💓
Thank you for the visit. Wishing friends, family, and blog readers a wonderful February. Before you go, please comment below.
If you like what you see, please re-share on social media and provide a link back to this post.
Here are some possible things to comment about:
What ideas do you like or use to improve self-care?
Where do you still need work?
Do you know low self-esteem is a learned habit and can be unlearned? What do you think about that?
What steps have you taken to help improve your opinion of yourself?
No links in comments please, as they won't be published that way.
This post was written for information and entertainment purposes only. If you need or want medical or psychological advice, consult with a professional provider.
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