Ways to Beat that February Slump

 

Why not dedicate the month of February as a month for love? Make the choice to focus on Valentine's Day and self-love, as a prompt for improved self-care and heightened self-compassion.  

 

If our energy, motivation, and mood dip during the winter, and gloomy weather, heavy workloads, shorter days, and Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) lead us down a path to overwhelm and burnout, now is the time to alter our perception.

Look Below For Ways to Beat that 

February Slump

1. Develop cozy rituals that encourage us to connect with loved ones. Make dates and chat with friends or family, or go to a concert, museum, play, or other beautiful cultural event with them. Sharing joy and pleasurable experiences with others makes it multiply. 

2. Start or end the day by writing out a gratitude list. An attitude of gratitude goes a long way in helping us accept where we're at, see and count our blessings, and find ways to love ourselves through a bad mood or rough patch. 

3. Practice slow living and reserve time and space to look inward instead of outward for comfort. Winter is a great time to retreat, restore, and reboot our spirit through prayer, reflection, rest, and contemplation.

4. Meditate (even for 2 minutes), practice deep breathing, or simply watch clouds roll by to relax and soothe jagged nerves.

5. Unplug from technological devices to recharge. Identify specific distractions, whether they’re notifications on phones or a cluttered workspace. Establish a distraction-free zone by turning off your phone during work hours and keeping work area organized and clutter-free.

6. Contact a friend or acquaintance you sense might need encouragement. When we reach out to help someone smooth out the rough edges, it momentarily gets our minds off ourselves, and makes us feel useful.

7. Learn something new by taking a short online course, watch a TED Talk, or attend an in-person course at a cooking or music school. When we tap into a creative outlet, our change of pace activity may make us feel inspired and more alive.

8. Assemble a Vision Board to visualize people, places, and things we want to draw into our lives in the future. Positive thinking and positive wishing are powerful tools for change.

9. Set achievable daily goals, and acknowledge progress, including "baby steps."

10. Affirm our goodness, lovability, and value as a human being and compose a few affirmations to honor ourselves. When we truly believe we are enough, it fosters increased self-contentment and self-esteem. 

11. Treat ourselves with self-compassion by being kind, loving, and caring (tender loving care). One study indicates loving ourselves unconditionally helps us feel emotionally safe and secure within ourselves. This sense of security helps us be our true, authentic self, with little fear of judgment or backlash from others.

12. Enjoy winter activities and embrace the beauty of the season by engaging in outdoor activities including ice skating, skiing, or simply making a giant snowman.

13. Look forward to the coming season by sketching out possible goals. Envision those positive things you can do to boost mood and motivation as the seasons evolve.

14. Prioritize sleep and treat rest as a key element for good health, not as a luxury. Stick to a consistent sleep schedule (7-9 hours). Create a cool, dark, quiet, and clutter-free bedroom, and establish relaxing bedtime routines like avoiding screens, caffeine, and heavy meals before bed. Here's a Gentle Self-loving Sleep Meditation by Julie Peters, one example of a relaxing way to prepare for a gentle night's sleep. 

Pick and choose activities and self-care practices that resonate for you. Want to spice up living? Perhaps you'll embark on a self-discovery adventure and try on a few self-care techniques that are new to you.

Some of the best ways to beat an emotional, physical, spiritual, or mental slump is to focus on small, actionable steps to reduce stress including body movement (walk, stretch, build a snowman), change of scenery (get outside or go to a movie), practice gratitude, and connect with a friend. Simple functions including showering, listening to or playing music, or doing a 5-minute de-clutter task can boost endorphins and shift our perspectives.

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Which self-care practices have you neglected over the holiday season and beyond? Does that serve you well? How can you be more consistent about doing them now? 

When I have a self-care lapse, I like to remind myself that I can start my day over any time I decide to do that. 

What helps you change your attitude or behavior, when you've started the day on the wrong foot? Please explain.

What things help you beat the blues, no matter what season it is? Please share.

I read and appreciate all comments, but will not be able to publish those that contain links. Thanks for understanding.

This post is offered for entertainment and educational purposes only, and is not intended as health advice. Check with your health care providers if you are suffering from SAD or other mental or physical health issues.

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Tips to Help You Beat Mother's Day Blues

Do the lovey-dovey Mother’s Day ads in the media make you cringe? Perhaps you can identify with me. If my emotions are left unchecked, the closer the holiday gets, the more stressed, moody, angry, depressed, teary, and out of sorts I feel.

Posted updated 4/11/2023

Some women are childless by choice. They were wise enough to know they were financially, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually unwilling to bear and raise children. Others may have a physical condition or personal reasons that preclude them from bearing or raising children. 

Some like me have had sketchy or tumultuous relationships with our children or mothers, through death or circumstances like estrangement, addiction, and mental illness. 

Most don't receive flowery Mother’s Day greeting cards or more than brief calls on Mother's Day. We also don't want to give empty gifts to people that don't treat us nicely. We just wish the day would disappear from the face of the calendar. 

I’m one of many women who grew up in a dysfunctional family. My mother grew up without a mother, and spent part of her childhood in an orphanage. At times, as an adult, my mother was severely depressed. She couldn't mother me in a consistently healthful way.

I’ve taken many steps to heal the trauma I experienced as a child, and am grateful I vented, mourned, and released much of the frustration, anger, and sadness I felt about the past. 

New life skills I adopted as an adult helped me reframe my concept of mother and mothering. Now I practice self-care skills that give me the love, safety, concern, and mothering I missed out on as a youngster. 

When I made the decision to imagine standing in my mother’s shoes, I saw her as she was before she was a mother. It's only then that I found myself appreciating her as a whole person, someone who had her own life, her own struggles and problems to solve. 

When I became willing to look at my mother from a different perspective, I found forgiveness, compassion, and hope for us both.

I use the day to honor those I hold near and dear as surrogate mothers, daughters, sisters, and mentors. I celebrate the healthy choices I’ve made that empower me as a woman and bring out the best in me and my relationships. 

I acknowledge AND APPRECIATE THOSE WOMEN WHO ARE DOING A GOOD JOB AS MOTHERS. Chances are your children will grow up to be self-sufficient and happy in their own skin, because that's the example you are modeling for them.

Understanding these things doesn't mean I'm free of blue feelings around this time of year. Although it’s been three decades since my mother died, bittersweet memories of our life together surface now. 

I've learned if I truly surrender my longing to have people in my life "fill in" or "make up" for past losses and grieve those that have actually died, my blues do eventually lift. 😌

Today I'm sharing ideas and tips that continue to help me. I envision them helping you too! Here goes...

18 Tips to Beat Mother's Day Blues

1. Know that you’re not alone. According to the U.S. Census Bureau’s Population Survey of 2014, 47.6 percent of women between age 15 and 44 had never had children, up from 46.5 percent in 2012. This represents the highest percentage of childless women since the bureau started tracking that data in 1976. 

2.Write in a Journal to get a better handle on thoughts and feelings of isolation, grief, anger, abandonment, and love. Connect with that tender, courageous human being inside you that needs your encouragement. For ideas see journal prompts and quotes to help you heal here. 

3. Participate in a bereavement group. Give and get understanding from those who are in a similar situation.

4. Reserve A Few Hours of Time to Help a Shut-in, Friend, or Relative. Make a home cooked meal or cookies, read aloud, or take on a few errands they haven't been able to do.

5.Call a loved one who lives across the miles for a phone visit or write a handwritten note to someone you’ve lost contact with. Giving love makes you better able to receive it.

6.Invite Someone to Join You for Brunch, Lunch, or Dinner. Recognize you aren’t the only one who may feel lonely or out of sorts at this time of the year.

7. Spend Time Pampering Yourself. Give yourself a facial, get a deep tissue massage, soak in a bubble bath, read a mystery, watch a DVD, or do something you ordinarily put off doing.

8.Get out of town, book a weekend get-away to a spa or dude ranch, or any change-of-scene place you think you would enjoy. If you can't afford a vacation, visit a museum, art gallery, park, or nature trail to fill up on beauty.

9.Exercise until those endorphins kick in. Keep the good vibes going by playing a sport or dance for fun.

10.Grab a half hour of sunlight early in the day or before dusk, when sun’s rays are less intense. Sunlight helps the body produce vitamin D, a mood elevator.

11.Take a nap, a good way to replenish vitality and restore your spirit.

  

12.Pick wildflowers or get yourself a bouquet of sunflowers. Yellow is s sunny color and its energy cheers you up.

13.Attend a religious, communal, or support group meeting to feel a sense of community and comfort. 

14.Listen to music or play a musical instrument that inspires you.

15. Read How to Celebrate Mother's Day If Your Mom Passed Away, from someone who has been there .

16. Set up an appointment for psychological counselling. Sharing with a pro who listens with an objective ear can help you see yourself and your situation in a new light. Read Tips to Help You Choose a Psychologist.

17. Tap into the lovingkindness inside yourself. Be your own best friend. Focus on things you’re grateful for, affirm your talents and assets, and give yourself radical self-compassion for as long as it takes to feel better. Then continue to be gentle with yourself every day of the year.

18.Write and say your own affirmations or use the ones below. Recite them aloud, when you feel blue, lonely, less than, and perceive “lack” instead of abundance. Please feel free to take what you like and leave the rest.

"I Face Challenging Situations with Grace."

"I am Confident in My Own Worth and Love Myself."

"I Accept My Mother and/or Children as They Are, and Affirm Our Relationships are Teaching Us Things We Need to Know."

Wishing You a Happy Mother's Day.

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Do you think Mother's Day advertising has gotten way out of hand? 

How do you want to spend Mother's Day? Any tips for me? 

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